Have you ever been going through a major shift in your life and, while you love posting a cute pic of your shoes on Insta or dishing about & sharing an incredible TED talk you saw on Facebook, it somehow didn’t feel right to you to share your MAJOR news?
The first time this happened to me was actually right after I left my career as a TV news reporter for NBC. I actually fell in love with the idea of keeping my life private, because I had spent time on live TV nearly every day for the past decade. I had no desire to be in front of a camera for videos or even stills. I stopped watching news for several months. I made a conscious decision to live my life and experience it everyday, instead of being focused on recording it. And that decision felt SO good.
Which may seem counter-intuitive coming from someone who teaches my clients how to be more visible in the world and get known through media interviews, videos and on stage, but it actually makes perfect sense. Just like we can come back to our work oh-so refreshed, filled up with new ideas and excitement after a REAL week or two away on vacation, I believe that taking a break from making your life public can lead to more inspirations, deeper insights about what to share, and, ultimately, more sanity.
Which is why, when I found out I was pregnant with our second baby last summer, I didn’t post it anywhere. And as the first weeks turned into months, I listened to my intuition that THIS time, with THIS baby, I wanted to cherish and honor my desire not to go public. There were moments where I almost couldn’t help but share… like when I found out we were having a girl and chose the color for her nursery…
But ultimately I chose to experience this pregnancy in real life, and not reveal it on social platforms until I was truly ready. Which is now.
Now, I’m 37.5 weeks pregnant. I’m round and emotional and totally ready to meet our little girl, Grace. I’m excited and scared and feeling so lucky at how smoothly the pregnancy has gone so far. And I’m just coming off of the most beautiful Blessingway ceremony, where I was surrounded by my tribe of women, honoring and nurturing me on my journey.
With Campbell I did a traditional shower, which was lovely and filled my home with so many cherished souls bringing gifts and showering me with joy. This time, each woman brought a bead that has been strung on a necklace for me to wear at my birth. They shared why they chose their bead and what our relationship meant to them. I cried more times than I can count out of gratitude.
And, while this pregnancy has been much more private it’s also felt more inward, which feels exactly right. I haven’t gotten the epic string of congratulations on Facebook, and I haven’t needed it. I’ll also enjoy it as the comments come in this week, because I’m ready to receive them.
So, this is my permission slip to you to choose what you share and when… and to see what it feels like to keep something big all to yourself for a while. I want you to play with your right to privacy, and know that it’s actually a wonderful privilege to share our lives with so many people in so many ways, but it’s not mandatory. It’s your life, it’s your news, and it’s your choice to share how you want when you want.
You might just be delightfully surprised at how incredible it can feel NOT to share every once in a while, just as I have been.